Several years ago, I interviewed Damali Ayo, an author and performance artist who is best known for her satirical exploration of race relations in America. Her first book was called How to Rent a Negro; now she's come out with a new title, Obamistan! Land Without Racism, an A-Z guide that imagines a satirical, utopian post-racism America now that we have a black president.
For example, you will find this excerpt listed under D for Drug Dealers:
…if you are a drug dealer of color and are ready to move on to other work opportunities, you should check out the MBA program at your local university. Having already proven your entrepreneurial skills, you will be given a full scholarship. You will probably drop out before you complete your degree, but as in the tradition of Harvard Business School, that will be because you have been offered a fantastic position at a successful firm. This will leave lots of job openings in your former field for white drug dealers to get their start. However, if you are a white drug dealer, you will need to take more serious precautions against arrest. Before, you could just hide behind a copy of the New York Times and watch as the cops cuffed and booked the brown-skinned man across the street. But your skin no longer serves as your get-out-of-jail-free card. You won't get less time or lighter sentences either. Basically, the free ride on your white horse is over.
And under Taxes:
An additional "white tax" is charged to people who are descended from or have benefited from the racism that fueled this country for so long. Contrary to what you might think, white people welcome paying the tax. They figure they are getting off easy and recognize that paying a few dollars here and there can't possibly be as painful as laboring for centuries without pay only to be discounted as nonhuman; stricken from voting; held back educationally; forced to live in squalor; assumed to be stupid, lazy, violent, angry, dirty, ignorant, and incompetent; arrested in epidemic proportions; and wrongfully sentenced to death.
After the jump, see the History flow chart that describes black history as seen by pre-Obamistan white people, who are referred to in the book as "Old Americans."
