Sleep Talkin' Man shares his somniloquies

Sleep Talkin' Man is a blog that collects the night-time musings of an Englishman named Adam, as recorded by his wife. The quotes are absolutely priceless, and you can even listen to some of them on streaming audio—which is a very weird experience. A few delightful examples:

From the night of Feb. 14/15: "Don't move a muscle. Bushbabies are everywhere… everywhere… Shoot the f***ing big-eyed wanky s**** f***s! Kick 'em. Stamp them. Poke 'em in their big eyes! Take that for scaring the crap out of me."

From the night of Jan 31/Feb 1: "I made this picture using pasta… F*** you, it IS artistic!"

From the night of Jan 19/20: "No, not the cats. Don't trust them. Their eyes. Their eyes. They know too much."

The best part, none of this is related to dreaming. As the Sleep Talkin' Man FAQ explains, dreaming and sleep talking actually happen during completely different parts of the sleep cycle. So all that bush-baby paranoia is just a blip on Adam's subconscious. There really is no context to make it make sense.