If America's law students continue to be this amusing, there may be hope yet for the future of America's lawyers. From Craigslist:
You & Me Doing It v. You & Me Not Doing It (2009)
Using that IRAC method we've been learning about, a compelling brief on why we should hump each other's brains out.
Facts, Issue, Rule, Analysis, and Conclusions follow.
Thanks to Sarahpi, one of my favorite lawyers-in-training!
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"You look like you would be HUGE, but I will still bravely tackle that monster.."
No. No, he isn't. And now he's dying inside.
I dunno, maybe I'm just not that observant when it comes to that department, but if his trousers are tight enough for you to ascertain the girth of his equipment, the junk is probably not working too well.
I think it's more of an impediment to fertility, what with the berries getting too warm that close to the oven. For her, that would probably be an advantage. Having been to law school, my guess is that she is not nearly as cute as she thinks, and he is probably more married than she's letting on. :-)
so far in this comment thread, i'm the only one that wishes she was writing this to me?
This is one of the biggest turn-ons I've ever read.
I hate to spoil everybody's fun, but I'm guessing there's about a 75% chance this was written by one of the guy's friends, as the first step in an admittedly brilliant (and cruel) prank.
1) Write letter
2) Create girly-sounding free email address
3) Subtly email intended recipient craigslist link.
4) Watch him desperately clutch printed letter, vainly searching for the supposed author.
I hate to spoil everybody's fun
Why do I doubt the veracity of that statement?
I totally should *not* have been reading this at work... No what am I supposed to do with *this*...
It's true! Just look at my comment history, I'm almost always a really positive guy.
P.S. - if this brief is genuine, I hope that she gets in contact with the guy, and that he's not already attached to somebody (or uninterested in her, or both).
Forgive me for being cynical, but "...You get free NSA sex..." sounds like a bold-faced lie when put in the context of her obsessing over this guy.
And i love the line "... all is well in My-Vagina Land."
If you're a woman, being catcalled and sexually harassed is not really an appropriate way to judge your attractiveness. It's a way to judge the behavior of the people you encounter, and if it happens frequently to you, it's not because of how you look, it's because of how they behave, i.e., poorly and inappropriately. Men are not so stupid they just can't help themselves from assaulting a woman they find attractive; it's a choice. These guys made the wrong one. It's time we got that into our heads. What's next - "I must be hot, because I've been raped five times, so I know I am"? I don't think so.
mcn, what the hell are you talking about? This was written by a woman to a man.
In the post, the writer assesses her attractiveness this way:
"I'm not perfect, but I get hit on, catcalled and sexually harassed frequently enough to assume I must be at least somewhat doable."
It's a joke, obviously, considering the tone of the entire thing.
Well it's written in a joking, self deprecating manor at least... like she is unsure of her looks (or at least how he would judge her looks).
I say seems faked. I haven't known a girl that would ever act like that. But then again I don't hang with the cat calling, causal sex crowd either...
It's Craigslist, remember? She's writing, *anonymously.* Maybe that's why you don't think you know any girls that would act like this ... because they don't tell you.
Not sure if it's faked or not -- of course it's possible -- but the humour, the writing style, and the desire actually reminds me of some women I know.
I can definitely think of a few gents I'd proposition this way, with the same conditions -- if I could do it anonymously.
I am purchasing my plane ticket to Los Angeles right now.
In my lifetime I've known two women with the outstanding wit and moxy to write something of this ilk. One of them was actually directed at me. So they are definitely out there and do these things at times.
Unfortunately, (in my experience) they are never physically the type to inspire the sort of ravenous, primal behavior they so eloquently describe.
I know, I know, I'll punch myself... just sayin'
Evidence that this is a fake: "What if it's really bad, and we end up having to awkwardly avoid one another in class for the next 4 years?"
Law school takes three years, not four (with some exceptions for some students I admit, but I still call BS).
Actually, if you read the original it strongly implies that the author is a night student. Most night law programs are 4 years, as they are intended for working stiffs and so must moderate - and thus stretch out - the courseload.
I have actually gotten letters like this, on a couple occasions, and they are not a turn on. They creep the fuck out of me. I'm a guy and I like girls, but I am scared by someone who not only seems to work up such an obsession with no encouragement from me, but then breaches all social decency and writes it to me in letter form. This is not a stable individual (if this is real at all, but like I've said, I've actually received similar--never from someone I would categorize as "sane"--and therein lies the problem), and one can be sure that there would be no "NSA" about it. This would end up haunting you and eating up your time and mental energy. The last two times this happened to me, the girls actually were very good looking, and I was kind of into them... Until the emails. Then I started locking my office door when I was in there.
Finally, even if she weren't insane, there's the George Costanza observation on a woman saying "Make love to me." It just sets the guy up for failure. What is she expecting? What if I can't deliver? As Antinous pointed out, including her assumption that he is "HUGE" will, more than likely, make the guy question his size (and therefore value as a man--a value that no makeup or surgery will fix, BTW). He probably isn't huge, but now some girl is staring at him and has decided he's huge, but even if he wanted to do something with her, he now has to wonder if this is what she meant by "HUGE," or if she's going to be disappointed.
No, this is not a good letter. Not a good letter at all.
So, the real question remains unasked: what kind of sex does the NSA practice?
/Joking. No, really.
Most sex is causal in some sense... ;-)
Yes, Kyle! A woman (who later married, then divorced my best friend) once started idly musing about the penis sizes of various people at a party, and she looked at me and said "and you've got at least nine inches".
To which I replied "Thanks, I guess, but you will never know."
I didn't want to shatter her somewhat exaggerated illusions by not, um, "measuring up". Caused me to skip a skinny-dipping gig at few months later, in fact. In retrospect I probably should've whipped it out at the party and called for a tape measure.
arkizzle - they listen in on everyone else's phone sex.
/Joking. Well, actually...