Father blames others for his own misinterpretation of candy wrappers as "pornographic"
Simon Simpkins of Pontefract, West Yorkshire became angry with a shop manager who sold him "pornographic" candy.
"The lemon and lime are locked in what appears to be a carnal encounter," Mr. Simpkins told a reporter for The Daily Mail. "The lime, whom I assume to be the gentleman in this coupling, has a particularly lurid expression on his face."
The green gentleman appears on other flavors of Haribo MAOAM sour candies, too, including cherry, as shown here.
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Last time I took my daughter to the LA Zoo some giraffes were mating. I didn't realize we had a case.
I do whatever Simon Says.
Last time I went to the florist I saw some flowers. There were no bees though, with or without lurid expressions. Thank goodness!
I'm far more concerned with the subliminal endorsement of morning Communism.
Jeez, Mark. How about a NSFW tag on this! Thank god they don't make a banana and peach flavored combo. My eyes would be steaming pools of vitreous humor.
I for one became intensely aroused by the wrappers. I'd hate to see what would happen if the candy was naked.
"The lime, whom I assume to be the gentleman in this coupling, has a particularly lurid expression on his face."
Funniest thing I have read this week.
Geez what a perv you are Simon, though the tought of a threesome with a couple cherries, man if only we had know...
Gahh, what a loser. Get OVER yourself.
I gave the article a quick read, and didn't see where it said he was suing about it. This:
certainly does sound like the sort of thing one says in a lawsuit, though. I can imagine how that went:Simon: These candy wrappers are obscene! I demand to see the manager!
Hapless Employee: Yes, sir.
Simon's Wife: Oh, dear, don't make a fuss.
Simon: Quiet, wife.
Manager: Yes?
Simon: I want to complain about these obscene candy wrappers!
Manager: WHAT? They're CARTOON characters.
Simon's Wife: Oh, Simon, please don't...
Simon: I TOLD YOU TO BE QUIET!
silence
Simon's Wife: coldly I'll be in the car.
I think it looks like their having sex. And they're clearly total fruits.
Maybe he was especially offended that the cartoon fruit in the picture were obviously of the same sex?
It looks like the struggle between innocent fruit sex and society's scorn has been going on for quite some time. Even the Jesuits were involved.
http://www.boingboing.net/2004/09/01/fruit-porn-sparks-ou.html
Great. Now all I can see is fruity copulation...
Sometimes a lime is just a lime. Now that I've seend this I realize that I too always try to lick my own eyeball when getting some of the old in out in out.
I don't think that's a lime. Wouldn't a lime look like the lemon, but green? This guy is just some kind of cartoon mascot.
And he's definitely sticking it to those fruits.
So THAT's how they get limons!
Damn, Gabe and Tycho might have cause for action.
at least it's wrapped.
Stop the miscegnation! Lemons, limes and cherries were not intended by God to mate and reproduce!
It also looks like the cherries are up for a threesome. Oh, the humanity!
Seriously, any 13 year old would see those as pornographic.
An illustrator somewhere is laughing his ass off.
Yeah, it's fun and games until you read the company's mission statement:
Make All Orgies About Munching.
It is mildly lurid.
That doesn't mean that it's harmful.
Children who see it will fall into two camps, those who don't get the winking joke and those that do. The ones that do see it will be doing what normal humans do, considering the full spectrum of human experience as they engage themselves with things they encounter in the world. This does not turn them into bad people, it simply means they are human, and slowly turning into adults, as children are wont to do.
You really don't want lemon juice spurting in your eye...
"The lime ..." Lime? I thought it was a big green penis!
> during a heated exchange, my wife became quite distressed and had to sit down in the car park.
I'm pretty sure that lime will be getting more action than Mr. Simpkins for the forseeable future.
Just think what would happen if Mr. Simpkins walked into a Cigar Shoppe ?
Penises.. everywhere.
LOL Webbie. What a money shot!
Snarf...The Daily Mail reporting as hilarious as ever!
There's probably a weird lonely guy in Japan somewhere who gets off on this.
Mmm, pornographic candy, agggh.
thank you, xophier, for the best comment so far. that said, i like that mr. simkins, in his complaint, correctly uses the word "whom."
Misinterpretation? Really?
I'm not defending his reaction, but there's clearly some hot cherrybonking going on in that picture.
I don't know about you guys, but I find those cherry siamese twins to be quite fetching.
But... But...
You people are talking as if fruits didn't have sex...
Well fruits are the sexual organs of trees...how would one expect them to be depicted? Though I must say that limes copulating with lemons and cherries is especially egregious.
Frankly I think the real problem here is fruits in general. We should not be exposing our children to the salacious sexual practices shrubs, grasses and trees. I call for an international campaign advocating the immediate removal of all fruits and berries from shops where the innocent eyes of children may fall upon them.
The way you squeeze my lemon,
I'm gonna fall right out of bed!
yummy. this makes me hungry. giiirl, i loved these as kid, not knowing that it's about making us addicted to sex...
In germany a group of students once wrote a letter to haribo, the company who sells this candy, complaining about exactly the same illustrations. the company very formally responded and apologized for the suggestive design.
for the ones of you who speak german: http://www.spiegel.de/schulspiegel/0,1518,316128,00.html
The real question that no one has been brave enough to ask is "What the hell is that lima bean doing there?" One cannot say that this is merely a stylized lime, because the lemon it is having sex with looks like a damn lemon. Are we really to belive that the artist drew an abstract lime and then got so caught up in this trans species marmalade sex romp he was perpetrating upon the world, that he forgot to draw an abstract lemon?
Rule 34
Do any of you have kids?
I CAN'T STOP RUBBING SOUR CANDIES ON MY NETHER REGIONS
Debunked as a hoax:
http://www.brandrepublic.com/News/929986/Maoam-carnal-complaint-letter-publicity-stunt/
Mike
@Zap That's rather forward...
Church, I was asking to see if there was a difference between the perception held by parents and non-parents. I find it funny, but I'm an adult. I would not want my minor-aged children to see it because they are not equipped to see the humor. It's hard enough to deal with their questions that come from so-called kids' television.
am i the only one who knows that's a soybean? not a lime?
refreshing how this story comes up again and again over the years ... I am amazed that Haribo did not feel compelled to take it down ... good for them ... if it looks dirty to you .. you have a dirty mind! :D
@ #37
That story states that it wasn't students, but a prank letter. Good going.
Maybe this guy Simon feels offended for a reason that's hard for Mark to understand. It's entirely possible that he sees something that Mark doesn't. That wouldn't make it a misinterpretation, that would mean that Mark has a shortfall as to what understanding others might mean.
For all the depth and attention this blog gives to alternative voices, the value of scientific objectivity, free-expression, tolerance, mind-expansion, and the beauty inherent in multidimenionality, it certainly breaches it's own integrity and limits it's own realm of possibility (with regular persistence) with those that frame their world in traditional ways, labeling them as idiots and losers, just like a grade school kid would do.
Long story short, I don't get it. Someone, please help me understand.
Someone, please help me understand.
It's called humor.
I get it now, holding up someone who may value sex as sacred in a specific way as a backwards, raving mental case is funny. Did I get that right?
Haribo's factory is in Pontefract and I think there may also be sweets called Simpkins, made by Haribo. The Daily Mail doesn't fact-check, otherwise it would be about two pages long. On a good day.
I for one am disgusted! Lemons should lay only with lemons, and limes with limes! This inter racial(?) sex will only lead to Socialism and Godlessness! What happened to the old real America, and America where fruits stuck with their own!!!
Sorry, didn't read Mike's @12.47. But the Mail comment is valid.
ZapGunner, I am a parent.
My children have known about sex since they were toddlers. They have seen domestic animals in the act many times and heard the deer and fox in the night.
My kids don't live in opaque bubbles and we prefer not to lie to them. They ask, so we tell. Is that a problem?
@#49:
no
Children have difficulty understanding humor because they were not well trained for it. And then they get their education from television instead of their parents. Then they have questions, which would be an excellent time to teach them the truth of the world, or equip them to discover the truth themselves.
@55
OUCH
Snacks like these undermine traditional produce values.
-- MrJM
its from the UK daily mail, so its safe to put in your "ignore the reactionary loon" folder. Mind you if he thinks thats bad he should see this
http://www.themeparkreview.com/europe2005/bonbonland/bonbonland1.htm
a danish sweet companies theme park, specifically aimed at kids complete with bare breasted lactating human - cow hybrids, sweets made to look like animal poop and vomiting fibreglass rats.
Scandinavians are weird.
@54 - BUDDY66, Would you be willing to expound? I'm sincerely wanting to understand.
@55 ALAN, I don't know that anyone needs to be trained to see humor, nor to discover the truth of themselves. Isn't both truth and humor a natural part of a child's inscape? If they need anything, I propose that they need to have that natural inscape affirmed and protected from the cynacism of adults, the cynacism inherent in a lack of endless wonder, curiosity and possibility.
"The lemon and lime are locked in what appears to be a carnal encounter," Mr. Simpkins told a reporter for The Daily Mail. "The lime, whom I assume to be the gentleman in this coupling, has a particularly lurid expression on his face."
Heterosexist.
@55...I have 3 children, ages 9, 8 and 6. Their development is on track and not hindered by dogma or overly-conservative values, but it is staggered by their mutual ages. You may have thought you scored a point by calling my parenting into question. I do not take offense at your assumptions.
@53...I do not lie to my children either. But that does not mean that I give them information that oversteps their developmental level. Do you tell dirty jokes to your children as well?
@47...I agree. But each person has their own prejudices. The people I have met who look down upon those they consider to be less intelligent than they are, or not as evolved as some on this blog assume the general population to be, only come across to me as masking inferiority. Or they just may not have the empathy to see through other's eyes.
It's just fucking fruit. Who the fuck cares about fucking fruit?
Misinterpretation? If they're not having sex, what the hell ARE they doing?
What I don't understand is why Mr. Simpkins thinks this is something to be upset about.
#64 "It's just fucking fruit. Who the fuck cares about fucking fruit?"
Other fruit, i would imagine.
ITO KAGEHISA @#53:
Well, I must say, the last bit of this sentence has me intrigued. Is "heard the deer and fox" a euphemism of some kind, yet unknown to me? A pun that I'm not getting?
What sounds do deer and fox make? Are they so loud or distinctive that they're what the kids notice when animals, well, act like animals?
I've heard cats bawling (heh) enough that I recognize what I'm hearing, but deer and fox?
I'm pretty sure the lemon is a dude. And Mr. Lemon totally needs a shave. Serious 5 0'clck shadow.
Most of the commentors have ruled out that the cartoony fruits are not getting it on.
The fruits could just be playing Twister.
I suppose you could see the lemon as intercourse, but the cherry is just some good old fashioned ball-licking.
@65 - HANGLYMAN,
My personal belief is that anyone who displaying outrage is in pain. My standard is that it's indignant to snicker at them. It isn't necessary to understand what they are in pain about to recognize and respond empathetically to their pain. For me, that's just human dignity 101.
Now we know that this was all a hoax, and that does not nullify the issue. I see it as a consistent pattern on this blog. I don't understand why it's necessary to publicly belittle someone if they are taking a stand, attempting to defend their intellectual framing or faith, or is in pain because their standards aren't met, or maybe because their values are being violated.
"anyone who displaying outrage is in pain." Sometimes. Sometimes they are just nasty people. Your average psychopath IS outraged when the flesh vending-machines around him refuse to perform properly (ie: to his will). Sometimes they are just intensely silly people.
You may notice that those who feel their values are being violated that are held up to ridicule here are those that want to force those values on others.
I am interested though, in how people on the autism spectrum learn about humour. It must be difficult indeed, but somehow some people do it.
@72...
"You may notice that those who feel their values are being violated that are held up to ridicule here are those that want to force those values on others."
I believe you are confusing a presentation of one's values as a means of forcing said values on others.
Also, if a person's values are held up to ridicule, are you implying that they should roll over and take it?
BTW, the thinly-veiled insult of calling those who do not agree with you autistic is appallingly childish.
perhaps you should read the post again - more carefully this time.
@72 TAKUAN:
Are you suggesting that a personal standard of dignity might be set by another's behavior, or by someone who may not agree with your values?
sorry, don't follow you, could you rephrase perhaps?
Takuan...Perhaps you should rephrase your post. It appears that I am not the only one who took offense.
Incendiary word choice may be your only issue, but I think it goes further.
Psychopath= The man is deranged for voicing his opinion? Or is it that he is deranged for not finding the illustrations humorous? Or simply not following your thought pattern?
To his will= The transaction of money for services or product puts each on equal footing, seller and buyer. Having bought the product, the buyer has an expectation of satisfaction. If he does not receive that satisfaction, he should be due redress.
Want to force those values on others= How is anyone, in a highly-monitored discussion such as this, forcing anyone to their will? Is ridicule not the most primitive form of coercion?
Some come here to belittle. Some here to discuss. Which are you?
TAKUAN, Yes, Thanks for asking, I desire to be clear and I can see that I wasn't.
I'm getting from your statement: "You may notice that those who feel their values are being violated that are held up to ridicule here are those that want to force those values on others." that you're approving of ridicule in these cases where there is a perception that someone's values are being forced on another. You're saying that they're asking for it, that they deserve it. (I hope to God I'm not misreading you.)
So, my response is: if they're behaving indignantly are you assuming license to treat them indignantly? Do you not hold yourself to the same standard of dignity to which you hold others?
If so, aren't you allowing their behavior to dictate yours?
Dear Sean: might I gently suggest you review precisely the meaning of "indignant" vis a vis "dignity"? I think I have your drift but I scent a difficult with terminology here.
Zap: please do not beat yourself senseless flailing at shadows. In the end you will find yourself quite tired - and still alone.
Zap@77,
I fail to see where Takuan likened the man in question to a psychopath. Rather Sean posed an observation on outrage, and Takuan expanded on it.
I mostly agree, outrage may be caused by pain. But more often than not, our (comfortable / western) outrage is rooted in entirely different emotions. At their basest interpretation, all of those emotions may distill down to pain or fear, but so does hate. And we don't like hate.
Is all outrage valid? I tend to think not.
man I need some candy
I brought these candies to work to share with co-workers a few months ago. We noticed the wrappers' sexualiciousness shortly after we noted the candy's non-deliciousness. So of course I laminated the wrappers with clear tape and put them up in random, strategic places in the office (bathrooms).
I believe there's also orange, strawberry, and perhaps apple. Definitely 5 or more flavors, all with Fruit Gone Wild on the wrappers. I found em in a gas station in Houston TX so I figured they must be commonly available.
I must say tho, sexy cartoon fruit is nothing to get all TOTC over, I mean kids will either get it and giggle, or they'll just eat the candy and not get it! Its just cartoon fruit sex...HOW does cartoon fruit sex damage children?
However, Mr. Simpkins was strangely silent regarding the action packed heavily armed mercenary fruit pies on the neighboring rack.
I recall a weird TV ad campaign from the 70s or early 80s, featuring football (soccer) hooligans invading the pitch and stopping the game in order to shout "we want MAOAM".
Hold on hold on!
Lordy be, you'd think everyone had found Maggie Thatcher shagging Prince Charles on the fourth (empty) plinth in Trafalgar Sq.
I personally am delighted that this has been brought to my amused attention - it was going to be hard catching a bird and a bee for those childhood discussions - now I can relax and use inanimate (apparently, when I'm not looking) fruit. And modern times dictate modern teachings - a threesome right there! Hooray! Look at the way that happy second cherry is bouncing in for some action - wonderful glee and freedom! With a little shimmy those cherries transform into testes and presto! The whole rainbow is covered!
I like it that the lime is going at it so hard his hat's fallen off. And his salacious, knowing wink as the lemon "zitrone" delights in his obviously expert doings.
I'll bet the kids take these to school, swap 'em and call them "sex sweets".
Or maybe, just maybe, they simply snort and giggle once, then enjoy the sweets, and spend the rest of the afternoon looking at the pros doing it for real on the xxx sites. Dunno - just guessin'.
And hold on! The lima bean / lime / whatever isn't actually one of the flavours! Zitrone is lemon, and Kirsche is cherry. He IS just there to make copulative fun!
The REAL fruit here is Simpkins. Lock him up.
btw MAOAM - palindromatic textual representatation of the capabilities of role-switching within sexual relations. Looks like "mooaaan" as well. Simpkins better get some glasses when he's in clink.
do think it's time to tell them what happens when you dry, powder and snort them?
Simpkin Simon met a Candy-Man going to the fair;
Said Simpkin Simon to the Candy-Man "What do you have there"
Said the Candy-Man to Simpkin Simon "A basket of playful fruit"
Said Simpkin Simon to the Candy-Man "Sir, I'll see you get the boot"
Said the Candy-Man to Simpkin Simon "Please do, and wear your best Law Suit"
@#17: Church, at least give the link to the quintessential Fruit Fucker moment: http://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2003/06/04/
takuan @ 74 - yes they do, and just like that.
Zap Gunner, I doubt very much we could come to any agreement on what constitutes a "dirty" joke.
I'll certainly agree that explanations of the world should be held to a child's attention span and level of comprehension. I also believe that child development is individualistic and it is foolish to pretend that all 2 year olds have reached the same level of development.
That being said, I have not yet met a child who could form the questions that could not understand the answers. Sex is a pretty straightforward process that mammals, at least, are predisposed to understand.
Little John, it's not a euphemism.
If you think mating cats are loud in the night, you never want to hear foxes.
Deer, normally they are pretty quiet, just the occasional snorting and blowing, but once a buck smells a doe in estrus he starts grunting, buzzing, and finally bleating and hollering like nothing you'd ever think could come from a deer. It doesn't go on for hours like fox mating, but it's pretty loud and distinctive.
I'm sure you could find examples of both on YouTube. But perhaps it's best if we don't tell anybody about that!
try mink, martens or fishers.
From the "debunked as a hoax" link — how does this qualify as being debunked?
Haha, I love that this candy made it onto Boing Boing. When I travelled around Europe with friends last year we found it and affectionally started calling it 'sex candy'. Pretty funny stuff when you think about it
Am I the only one who believes that, while the wrappers are not particularly offensive, they are somewhat inappropriate?