The Periodic Table of Awesoments

Here's the complete image, at eatliver.com. Okay those guys are assholes, they reposted the awesome work of DAPPERSTACHE without attribution. Here's the original. (Thanks, Coop!)

[#1 posted by Fred Rated , December 16, 2008 11:08 AM]

I don't see Boing Boing, Ron Jeremy, or tiramisu, therefore I question the methodology of this chart.

[#2 posted by darue , December 16, 2008 11:08 AM]

taco bell. jeez. gag me with a spoon. USDA Grade B beef, yum!

[#3 posted by Piedmont , December 16, 2008 11:10 AM]

I got excited when I didn't see bacon with the rest of the food in your crop. I became very sad after clicking the link.
Seriously nerds, it's over bacon isn't that great.

[#4 posted by philoponia , December 16, 2008 11:19 AM]

Honestly, I think almost everything there is awesome. I question that fireworks are alkali earth metals though, despite their universally-agreed-upon awesominity.

[#5 posted by Anonymous , December 16, 2008 11:22 AM]

Curiously, Chuck Norris doesn't rate a symbol.

[#6 posted by Takuan , December 16, 2008 11:27 AM]

no Ichor?

[#7 posted by Xeno , December 16, 2008 11:35 AM]

Arrr matey! I be seein Ninja but no bleedin Pirates! Me be thinkin this be an incomplete chart from the 1600's when the Ninja Emperial guard banished the Piratical element from the chart of awesomeness... YARRRR! Friggin Ninjas!

[#8 posted by Piedmont , December 16, 2008 11:39 AM]

Xeno- they're almost right next to each other.

[#9 posted by Xeno , December 16, 2008 11:40 AM]

Yarr, I be seein pirates now. I be fergittin that I be havin a patch over both me eyes.

[#10 posted by darkbeanie , December 16, 2008 11:42 AM]

It's just way too easy to comment about stuff that's missing, but still, I'm a little disappointed that they left out honey badgers.

[#11 posted by Anonymous , December 16, 2008 11:51 AM]

They should've stuck with the original symbols... It would have been harder but so worth it.

[#12 posted by LPJ , December 16, 2008 11:58 AM]

I'm surprised no one has talked about the compound possibilities ... for example, table salt would be equal parts Chuck Norris and zombies. Now that's awesome. Wouldn't glucose be the staggering mix of six parts beer, twelve parts bacon, and six parts cheese? Man, that works on so many levels ...

[#13 posted by Lobster , December 16, 2008 11:59 AM]

I disagree, #3. Bacon is not popular because it's a meme, bacon is popular because it is wonderful.

[#14 posted by Fred Rated , December 16, 2008 12:35 PM]

#1 Shatnerium.

[#15 posted by faggotina , December 16, 2008 12:37 PM]

Vnc, wrfr nd jnkfd = wsm? F***ng stpdst thng 'v vr sn pstd n BngBng.

[#16 posted by simonemarie , December 16, 2008 12:40 PM]

Rw. that is funny.

[#17 posted by The Bark Petition , December 16, 2008 12:47 PM]

Shouldn't it be "Yin Yang," instead of "Ying Yang?" Just saying...

[#18 posted by Anonymous , December 16, 2008 12:49 PM]

Anyone else think that if boobs is one of the Awesoments, its Awe-tomic Symbol should be Dd?

dr. awkward

[#19 posted by castewar , December 16, 2008 12:50 PM]

I question the validity of this table, as see no Airwolf or Ultraman.

[#20 posted by Sekino , December 16, 2008 12:52 PM]

Bob Saget in the Chuck Norris/William Shatner/Mr T family?

What's his weapon; deadpan?

[#21 posted by Anonymous , December 16, 2008 1:15 PM]

Why is bacon not on this list?

[#22 posted by Jake Bullet , December 16, 2008 1:21 PM]

Mr. T's symbol is BA.

Awesome!

[#23 posted by SC_Wolf , December 16, 2008 1:33 PM]

@SEKINO #19:
Bob Saget's weapon is unfiltered profanity(NSFW).

But I didn't come here to say that. I came here to bemoan the lack of vikings on the chart.

[#24 posted by Sekino , December 16, 2008 1:41 PM]

#21 Bob Saget's weapon is unfiltered profanity(NSFW).

o_O ... jolly good then.

[#25 posted by IronyElemental , December 16, 2008 2:32 PM]

Pick 2 or 3 of those, splice them together, and you have the perfect algorithm for generating awesome

1) band names
2) screen names
3) video games
4) anime titles

"I love to rock out to The Batman Bacon Explosion while I play Laser Jet Pack Mecha. You should look me up and we can play. I go by 'Space Boobs' online."

[#26 posted by IronyElemental , December 16, 2008 2:32 PM]

Addendum: What's a Jet Figther?

[#27 posted by Metlin , December 16, 2008 2:34 PM]

That list is missing Raptors!

[#28 posted by Anonymous , December 16, 2008 2:39 PM]

you forgot velociraptors!?!

[#29 posted by Anonymous , December 16, 2008 2:44 PM]

using the logic from the movie Evolution, we (humans) are made up of beer, and our poison is kool-aid. But the aliens are made up of Chocolate, so if we follow the pattern and go over one, down two, their poison must be... RAMEN!

So, thusly if we are ever invaded by awesome aliens made of pure chocolate, we can defeat them with ramen noodles!

[#30 posted by Cupcake Faerie , December 16, 2008 2:45 PM]

Cn = Cannabis ?

[#31 posted by elisd , December 16, 2008 2:45 PM]

So, Pirates have the highest electronegativity? Chuck Norris explodes when exposed to water? Goiters are caused by a lack of Robots? Time Travel is liquid at room temperature? Computer Chips are made out of Beef Jerky?

Yes, this table checks out perfectly.

[#32 posted by TrickyBeta , December 16, 2008 2:58 PM]

I HATE when people link to EatLiver. They're a site that steals pictures for ad bandwidth. Try going to the JPG without a proper referral link, and you get redirected to a "You can't see this image" replacement.

The original site is here:
http://www.dapperstache.com/index.php?contenttype=ptoa

[#33 posted by Alpinwolf , December 16, 2008 3:50 PM]

There *are* several unnamed slots, so complete your own! (Family Fun!) What's more awesome than Personalized Awesome?

The elemental symbol for Chuck Norris is "Chuck". You can't abbreviate the Chuck.

I'm for a listing of xkcd as well, symbol XD perhaps. It does get da laffs.

Seconded re: Boobs=DD (doesn't quite work as well with the traditional Dd, so some warrant a better symbol. :)

[#34 posted by Amphigorey , December 16, 2008 3:57 PM]

Wow, that's a seriously male-centric list.

[#35 posted by jonrock , December 16, 2008 4:27 PM]

RESPECT CREATORS' RIGHTS

LINK TO THE ORIGINAL

DON'T LINK TO A CONGLOMERATION SITE RIPOFF

http://www.dapperstache.com/index.php?contenttype=ptoa

[#36 posted by jonrock , December 16, 2008 4:30 PM]

Respect creators' rights!

Link to the original!

Don't link to attribution-removing ripoff sites!

http://www.dapperstache.com/index.php?contenttype=ptoa

[#37 posted by Xeni Jardin , December 16, 2008 6:09 PM]

@jonrock, don't get your panties in a bunch, dude -- just give me a heads up that there is a mis-attributed source, and I'll update immediately. I have done so here. We get link suggestions from people a gazillion times a day, and we can't factcheck the provenance of every jpeg to see which blog blogged it first, we're relying on a combination of gut instinct, googling, knowledge that comes from a lot of compulsive websurfing, and the reputation of the submitter. When there's an oversight, we correct it. Done.

[#38 posted by Pipenta , December 16, 2008 6:55 PM]

#34

Just what I thought. Where is Sigourney Weaver? Where is Betty Page?

I mean really, if it's a PERIODic table, you gotta have the chick element and boobs alone don't cut it.

[#39 posted by erindipity , December 16, 2008 7:17 PM]

Chuck Norris doesn't have a symbol because he roundhouse kicked it into space when it tried get in his square. Everybody knows that.

[#40 posted by BlackTiger , December 16, 2008 8:07 PM]

The best part is when you start applying actual chemical bonding rules to create compounds of awesome.

You'll notice that pirates are incredibly reactive, while Ninjas refuse to interact with anything.

Also: Chuck Norris Zombies can be made to dissolve in water.

[#41 posted by jonrock , December 17, 2008 2:20 PM]

@Xeni: panties unbunched, thanks! Sorry for the double post.