Large Hadron Collider hasn't sucked us into a black hole (yet)

The Large Hadron Collider was fired up today and we're apparently all still herezajkekukja.....

[#1 posted by Anonymous , September 10, 2008 10:56 AM]

My car keys went missing today, I for one blame the LHC

[#2 posted by manicbassman , September 10, 2008 10:59 AM]

that's cos they haven't started banging things into each other yet...

[#3 posted by Joe , September 10, 2008 11:03 AM]

The LHC will accelerate particles to about 7 TeV, which is about a billion times weaker than the most energetic cosmic rays ever detected. So if the LHC could blow us up, we'd have been goners long ago.

Also, if the LHC does succeed in producing an atomic-sized black hole, that black hole won't suck anything up. Rather, it will almost instantly disappear in a burst of Hawking radiation.

See http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hawking_radiation

[#4 posted by DaveX , September 10, 2008 11:03 AM]

Does anyone know how long it would take for a mini black hole to destroy the Earth? Would there be time to reflect on it, or would this be a fairly instantaneous thing?

Either way you look at it, what an exciting experiment!

[#5 posted by acrocker , September 10, 2008 11:04 AM]

has everyone noticed www.google.com today?

[#6 posted by acrocker , September 10, 2008 11:07 AM]

#3 good question. IANAP but I'd imagine it'd be pretty quick. you have an event horizon within about 7000 miles of you and I'd think you'd be toast pretty fast.

[#7 posted by indiebass , September 10, 2008 11:10 AM]

Stay current on the issue: http://www.hasthelargehadroncolliderdestroyedtheworldyet.com/

[#8 posted by dvandok , September 10, 2008 11:16 AM]

#5: How do you arrive at such an event horizon? It depends entirely on the mass of the black hole. The purported black holes will be so small (initially) that the event horizon will be very small (much smaller than an atom). Needless to say it will be hard to throw anything in it.

They didn't do any collisions today anyway. Just send the beam around clockwise three times, and counterclockwise in the afternoon. Collisions are planned in October.

[#9 posted by dfletcher , September 10, 2008 11:17 AM]

The world is still here because Gordan Freeman is running late and hasn't pushed the test sample into the resonance cascade yet!

I'm not looking forward to the sexual repression field that the combine is going to set up shortly, I'm ready to kick some combine butt!

Well, I'm off. Gotta prepare my arsenal. See you in City 17!

Wait, were we talking about scientists or Republicans? ;-)

[#10 posted by Chuck , September 10, 2008 11:19 AM]

Yeah, everything seems fine so far, so there's really no reason to be concerned about...

Wait... Someone just screamed "ASPHALT WHIRLPOOL" outside.

My blender exploded. My cat just turned inside out!

What's that light?

Beetles. Beetles! BEETLES!

The plaster in my walls just transformed into a living wave of strobing fuscia faceless hedgehogs -- each chanting one of the names of God backwards -- stampeding backwards in time!

BRUSHED STEEL TENTACLES!

There are two of me! There are THIRTEEN POINT NINE of me! IT KEEPS GROWING! WHAT'S THE FORMULA?!?!? TAKE YOUR FINGER OFF THE ENTER KEY ON ... WHICH GOD'S KEYBOARD?!?!? IT USES RED MERCURY FOR BLOOD! YEEEAAAAARGH!

NO CARRIER

[#11 posted by Glossolalia Black , September 10, 2008 11:28 AM]

*tape runs out*

[#12 posted by decius , September 10, 2008 11:38 AM]

So, the Earth in THIS universe wasn't destroyed, but think about how the overall probability range for human outcomes has been narrowed due to all the universes in which the Earth WAS destroyed! Jerks!

[#13 posted by ThreeFJeff , September 10, 2008 11:38 AM]

Chuck, the Salvia Divinorum thread is over here.

[#14 posted by grooverut , September 10, 2008 11:41 AM]

http://www.hasthelhcdestroyedtheearth.com/ and http://www.hasthelargehadroncolliderdestroyedtheworldyet.com/ are both good sources. The first has an rss feed too.

Reading the source is good for a kick.

[#15 posted by gd23 , September 10, 2008 11:42 AM]

Don't worry John Titor is on his way soon

[#16 posted by MarlboroTestMonkey7 , September 10, 2008 11:55 AM]

Whew! Just in time for me to lead the terminator lady who have been on my tail all day to it.

[#17 posted by ed g. , September 10, 2008 11:59 AM]

The LHC goes online, and Kim Jung-il disappears. That's supposed to be a _coincidence_. Right.

[#18 posted by W. James Au , September 10, 2008 12:11 PM]

So if the Hadron collider creates a black hole in Europe, will I at least have like a few minutes in California to get in a sex quickie or something before I'm sucked into the vortex? Also, is there a Twitter feed I can follow, i.e., "OMFG black hole now in EU, u shud say bye to fam/pray/have sex now."

[#19 posted by Chuck , September 10, 2008 12:15 PM]

ThreeFJeff:
>Chuck, the Salvia Divinorum thread is over here.

A-HA! There's no such thing as physics. Only drug use.:-)

[#20 posted by Gary61 , September 10, 2008 12:17 PM]

re: DaveX .....
"Does anyone know how long it would take for a mini black hole to destroy the Earth? Would there be time to reflect on it, or would this be a fairly instantaneous thing?"

A really good book was written about this sort of thing (with ancient civilizations thrown in for good measure) by the hard sci-fi author Gregory Beford - it's called 'Artifact'.

Wiki:
Gregory Benford

Book (Amazon):
'Artifact' by Gregory Benford

[#21 posted by Gary61 , September 10, 2008 12:18 PM]

Of course, you won't have time to read it ....

[#22 posted by Keneke , September 10, 2008 12:29 PM]

I read somewhere, back before the CERN guys explained away the fear, that a created 1-atom black hole in the absence of Hawking radiation (cause, you know, its a postulated radiation, never observed) would swallow the entire earth in four minutes in an exponential fashion (since the mass absorbed would make it grow.

[#23 posted by gATO , September 10, 2008 12:37 PM]

Science. It works, bitches.

(too early to quote xkcd?)

[#24 posted by dougrogers , September 10, 2008 12:41 PM]

We're still here? How do we know for sure? We might have been popped off into an alternate Universe. You really wouldn't be able to tell the difference.

[#25 posted by FourFiveFire , September 10, 2008 12:42 PM]

I, for one, am waiting on the LHC to blast our particles into the Casa Bonita dimension. Because if it's one thing I pine for day in and day out, it's a universe that only consists of taco platters and cliff divers.

[#26 posted by Enochrewt , September 10, 2008 12:43 PM]

LOL I've heard so many different theories about what would happen if a black hole was created, now I want to know which one is true.

A mini-blackhole would be small enough to pass through the earth undetected, causing no damage.

a mini-blackhole would dissapear in a puff of hawking radiation.

a mini-blackhole would take 40 years to gather enough matter to engulf the earth, and by then the solar system would move along it's orbit and it wouldn't destroy the earth.

it would take 4 minutes to destroy the earth.

So which is it debunkers? Get your facts straight :P

[#27 posted by Scuba SM , September 10, 2008 12:44 PM]

DFletcher,
It's only a matter of time. He's already there:
http://www.joystiq.com/2008/09/09/terrible-news-gordon-freeman-spotted-near-large-hadron-collider/

[#28 posted by Cyberwasteland , September 10, 2008 12:51 PM]

if (!(typeof worldHasEnded == "undefined")) {
document.write("YUP.");
} else {
document.write("NOPE.");
}

From: http://www.hasthelargehadroncolliderdestroyedtheworldyet.com/

So That's the code you need to see if the world has ended! Brilliant!

[#29 posted by RJ , September 10, 2008 1:00 PM]

That's a tremendous achievement. I'm excited to think of the things they'll learn with the LHC.

[#30 posted by Yamara , September 10, 2008 1:03 PM]

This is the 1197th time I have posted this, if my count remains correct.

It has been September 10, 2008 for the past 27 years, 219 days. Is there anyone else out there who has noticed this. Ha ha.

Each loop is approximately 12.537 minutes shy of 24 hours. It is invariable. I am never able to find out why.

I never am able to post higher than #10 on the comments of this article, but I cannot stop myself from trying every time.

God how I hate the Swiss.

[#31 posted by MarlboroTestMonkey7 , September 10, 2008 1:03 PM]

Joe, don't try to confuse us with your "facts"!

Now, high energy cosmic rays might be hitting us all day, but has anyone predicted what would happen if such rays encounter a LHC micro black hole in their path?

[#32 posted by gATO , September 10, 2008 1:16 PM]

Yamara: hmm... maybe that explains why I've been feeling sooo bored this week...

[#33 posted by jimkirk , September 10, 2008 1:28 PM]

I thought I felt a great disturbance in the Force earlier today...

[#34 posted by Mingross , September 10, 2008 1:32 PM]

I so badly wanted the LHC to open up a portal to another dimension through which some kind of horrible H.P. Lovecraft beastie could enter our world. I'm so disappointed. :(

[#35 posted by mightymouse1584 , September 10, 2008 1:33 PM]

science, it still works, bitches.

[#36 posted by moonracer23 , September 10, 2008 2:02 PM]

Forget Gordan Freeman, who else remembers this classic game intro?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1j4gO9sR7zs

[#37 posted by Falcon_Seven , September 10, 2008 2:09 PM]

It's not the whizzy roundy-round that's the problem. It's the kaboom at the end, which you won't hear because the Earth will be sucked into the singularity that is created by the particle collisions.

[#38 posted by tallpat , September 10, 2008 2:49 PM]

The LHC won't successfully create a mini-blackhole until December 21, 2012. Even the ancient Mayans knew this.

[#39 posted by IamInnocent , September 10, 2008 2:50 PM]

"Large Hadron Collider hasn't sucked us into a black hole"...

... or so you think!
I say, I'm pretty sure that we just went through that &)(*)(&* black/worm hole and that we are on the other side where everything is reversed: didn't notice that McCain passed Obama in the poll just at that moment?

OK, since everything is reversed : Xeni, would you marry me? (Now we'll know for sure!)

J.

[#40 posted by harpdevil , September 10, 2008 3:09 PM]

I have been enjoying responses to a question on Yahoo Answers that asks, "Is the world rly ending 2morrow?"

Answers include, "um have you been living under rock or something it was today it was gonna end their was so much talk about it in the news how did you not no seriosly?"

Many refer to that fact that the world was SUPPOSED to have ended today, as if the planet's destruction was scheduled for today but the universe missed the appointment.

Another patron replies, "I am from the west coast, just a few hours east of the International Date Line, and no, I do not believe it has happened or is going to happen."
You do not believe it has happened? What are we thinking here? That the world has ended but hasn't got to you yet because of the time difference??

[#41 posted by Eris Siva , September 10, 2008 3:11 PM]

From what I understand - they have yet to actually collide anything yet. That apparently will not be taking place until October.

So - keep your britches on everyone. We've still got a way to go 'til #doomsday.

[#42 posted by jesushootscores , September 10, 2008 3:38 PM]

A big bang constitutes a happy ending in my book.

[#43 posted by David Voss , September 10, 2008 3:47 PM]

As physicist Michael Peskin says, most of his
colleagues have been booking sabbaticals in Geneva, not Melbourne...

http://physics.aps.org/articles/v1/14

[#44 posted by cherry shiva , September 10, 2008 4:51 PM]

i remember when this happens next ime

[#45 posted by Bloo , September 10, 2008 5:23 PM]

Hey, if we do get sucked into a black hole, maybe we'll find out what happens to when the Lorentz facot becomes imaginary as c becomes exactly the speed of light; the basis for so many science fiction 'warp drive' plots.

[#46 posted by Aloisius , September 10, 2008 6:05 PM]

Why does it taste like red shift?

[#47 posted by alisong76 , September 10, 2008 6:14 PM]

I can't be the only one who misreads/mistypes that as "hardon"

[#48 posted by ibdense , September 10, 2008 6:52 PM]

About 3:30 am Pacific Time I woke and realized that if the world had not ended 3.25 hours before.

I told my wife that the world didn't end after all.

She said "How can you tell?" and went back to sleep. I did not get back to sleep until 6:45.

[#49 posted by byronba , September 10, 2008 8:31 PM]

"Where's the Kaboom? There was supposed to be an Earth-shattering Kaboom!"
- Marvin the Martian

[#50 posted by codesuidae , September 10, 2008 8:42 PM]

@47:
"The Large Hardon Collider Creates the Largest Black Hole on Earth" sounds like a great porn flick title!

I wonder if people will ever have enough to do/be well enough-educated that they'll stop worrying about silly things?

Na. What fun would that be?

[#51 posted by dainel , September 10, 2008 11:21 PM]

They haven't actually started the collisions yet, and even then will only gradually increase power. It will only reach full power in a few months time.

Or so they say. We don't know when they will actually start creating earth-eating black holes. The whole idea is to mislead us into complacency. "Yes, there's still plenty of time to stop them ..."

The plan is to later make a press release, "Oh, we've actually been creating black holes the past 2 months. They earth has not been destroyed yet. See, it's all safe".

Or it could be, "A minor miscalculations (due to the extremely complicated maths involved) has resulted in a few black holes being created at the LHC at CERN. These micro black holes are now gradually eating up the core of the planet. As they grow larger, the process will accelerate and the black holes will merge into one. Eventually, a few days before the entire planet is sucked into the black hole, we will see an increase in the number of earth quakes and storms. Physicists estimates that this will occur approximately 2 to 6 months in the future. Everyone is urged to evacuate the planet as soon as possible."

[#52 posted by Anonymous , September 11, 2008 6:03 AM]

And you people claim to believe in science!

I know for a fact that a black hole WAS created, which caused a temporal loop in which the past week repeats infinitely. So, this dimension will never be destroyed, as the process whereby THIS black hole consumes the earth will never complete.

Now, dimension12^zxf is another matter entirely.

[#53 posted by GraemeM , September 11, 2008 11:08 AM]

Why is this thread focusing on mini black holes, the CERN (European Agency for Nuclear Research) have more ways of destroying the universe! Have a look at Vacuum Bubbles and Strangelets!

http://public.web.cern.ch/public/en/LHC/Safety-en.html

Evidently a Vacuum Bubble will expand at the speed of ligh...

[#54 posted by Anonymous , September 11, 2008 7:38 PM]

You win again, science!

[#55 posted by Gary61 , September 12, 2008 1:19 PM]

Science = WIN
Politocratshitheads = FAIL FAIL FAIL

see? it's easy!

[#56 posted by Anonymous , September 22, 2008 5:57 PM]

Kelly from UK says:
I am not a mathematician nor a scientist.
Sometimes I just "see" things as an observer.

I propose there is no limitation on the creative size of a black hole; Mini, Large or Gigantic.

The reference point is a singularity.
Therefore size is irrelevant.

Creating a singularity point in spacetime would likely cause transfer of energy from one universe to the creation of a sibling in a localized area; separated by spacetime we call an event horizon.

Could a singularity gap be plugged once created if energy cannot be created nor destroyed?