Clown-cigarette umbrella
Here's a striking image from the Aug, 1931 issue of Modern Mechanix; an elaborate cigarette umbrella that keeps a clown's smoke safe from seltzer attacks.
No More Rain-Soaked Cigarettes! (Aug, 1931)MANY are the inventions devised to insure a dry smoke, but it has remained for a clown appearing with a circus in England to solve the problem. An umbrella over the smoke keeps off water and a spigot drains off excess moisture.

MANY are the inventions devised to insure a dry smoke, but it has remained for a clown appearing with a circus in England to solve the problem. An umbrella over the smoke keeps off water and a spigot drains off excess moisture.

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truly, the spirit of chin dogu has long been with us.
Designed by clowns, for clowns. By the people that brought you the beer helmet.
Pedantic Anal English Major sez:
[...] insure a dry smoke...
s/b "ensure"
There is no problem that cannot be solved with the proper application of clowns
@#3
Argumentative Internet Jackoff says:
It's fine the way it is.
http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=insure
1.to guarantee against loss or harm.
http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/insure
2 : to make certain especially by taking necessary measures and precautions
Oh yeah? Well I just got a custom raincoat, circa 1887, for my bong.