Geoducks: the world's weirdest clams

Geoducks are large saltwater clams that live off the Pacific Coast of the U.S. and Canada. I find them very curious and otherworldly. Dark Roasted Blend posted an homage to their bizarre beauty. Link

[#1 posted by holtt , June 10, 2008 11:07 AM]

I dare you to crop the right part (shell) out of the picture...

[#2 posted by Glasses , June 10, 2008 11:08 AM]

Remember everyone, it's pronounced 'Gooey-duck' and yes, it is that phallic. It's also the mascot of my alma mater, The Evergreen State College in Olympia, WA. You should have seen the costume the guy wore.

[#3 posted by trr , June 10, 2008 11:10 AM]

They're easy to find too.
When you step on the spot where one is underneath on the beach, they'll squirt some water up your leg. They can get bigger than the one pictured BTW.

[#4 posted by JDubsMontreal , June 10, 2008 11:12 AM]

"Dirty Jobs" with best-host-ever Mike Rowe covered these things in a great/disgusting/great-again episode. Video sample here.

JDubs

[#5 posted by Stuart Ellis , June 10, 2008 11:17 AM]

They are apparently tasty... Not that I've ever eaten on.

There's a great Chinese restaurant here in Portland called OM that has a tank of 'em right next to the lobsters.

[#6 posted by Razzabeth , June 10, 2008 11:20 AM]

What with the woman's perfectly manicured nails wrapped tightly around that greasy, wrinkly mass of flesh, and her plaid shirt just visible further up her arm.. reminds me of that weird 70's porno book I found under my parent's bed back in '98.

(P.S. Some of you have been confused, but Razzabeth is a female. The 'beth' should've given you a clue.)

[#7 posted by bluepez , June 10, 2008 11:22 AM]

@2 I am jealous of your mascot and fight song. What would Freud say?

Link to Evergreen Geoduck page

[#8 posted by holtt , June 10, 2008 11:26 AM]

I hugely apologize for this but I was unable to help myself. I give you... geose...

http://img234.imageshack.us/my.php?image=geosejh6.jpg

[#9 posted by arkizzle , June 10, 2008 11:35 AM]

OK, Rule 34 challenge!

Game On!

[#10 posted by Lobster , June 10, 2008 11:40 AM]

Geoduck? Isn't that a pokemon?

[#11 posted by Berix , June 10, 2008 11:46 AM]

This post should have been marked NSFW (or any other place for that matter). I will submit it as evidence next time you guys complain about being wrongfully blocked as a pr0n site serving bestiality involving invertebrates. (Then again some women might argue that anything involving men would fall under that category.)

[#12 posted by sloth , June 10, 2008 11:47 AM]

My favorite Evergreen State College bumper sticker reads "Geoduck for state bird!"

Man, I love that school.

[#13 posted by Hal Eckhart , June 10, 2008 11:50 AM]

How can you possibly mention geoducks without linking to Joey Skaggs? One of the all time great hoaxes by a genius hoaxster.

[#14 posted by David Pescovitz , June 10, 2008 11:52 AM]

@HAL (#13), Thank you for that! I love Joey Skaggs's work and had forgotten all about that. Nice.

[#15 posted by arkizzle , June 10, 2008 11:57 AM]

Ok, I had a look, and couldn't find any Rule34 candidates.. Do you think maybe we've found.. The Exception?

Is it perhaps so obvious, that no one has thought to do it yet?

We need to move on this people.. Has anyone living on the Pacific coast got access to a geoduck? A camera? A willingness to become the "next big thing" on the internet? I mean Goatse and TubGirl still haven't waned, have they? C'mon people, lets make history!

[#16 posted by adsum , June 10, 2008 11:58 AM]

YAY! I go to Evergreen!

(I try to get people to pronounce my geo metro, gooey metro)

[#17 posted by MITTZNZ , June 10, 2008 12:07 PM]

That looks like something else. I can't quite figure out what, though.

[#18 posted by Xenu , June 10, 2008 12:24 PM]

If you eat one of these, and you're a man, does that make you gay?

[#19 posted by holtt , June 10, 2008 12:31 PM]

Ok, I had a look, and couldn't find any Rule34 candidates.. Do you think maybe we've found.. The Exception?

Arkizzle it's just begging for photoshop porn. I haven't searched for it but I know it could be made... See my Geose image for example...

[#20 posted by arkizzle , June 10, 2008 1:00 PM]

Holtt:

Yeh, that's just cheating when it comes to Rule34.
Porn is pure and innocent, so let's not corrupt it with fakery ok? :)

[#21 posted by Takuan , June 10, 2008 1:04 PM]

GEODUCK SEVICHE

Geoduck siphon
Tomato
Lime juice
Cilantro
Cucumber
Onion
Salt

Cut geoduck into strips, 1/4 x 1/4 x 1 inches, add to bowl with chopped onion, cover with fresh squeezed lime juice and salt. Let steep 3 to 4 hours. Drain and reserve liquid. Add chopped tomato and cucumber. Add reserved liquid to taste. Top with fresh cilantro.

[#22 posted by EddieR , June 10, 2008 1:21 PM]

Ran across this

http://www.themeparkreview.com/forum/files/geoduck-jockey-lrg_987.jpg

[#23 posted by AROSEN , June 10, 2008 1:53 PM]

You have to check out this Geoduck clip:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z5_tSPkVpJI

[#24 posted by arkizzle , June 10, 2008 2:32 PM]

Ok Holtt, this is as far as I go toward it..

Caption Competiton (NSFW?)

[#25 posted by holtt , June 10, 2008 2:47 PM]

Ok Holtt, this is as far as I go toward it..

Caption Competiton (NSFW?)

Chum Guzzler

[#26 posted by holtt , June 10, 2008 2:53 PM]

Ok Holtt, this is as far as I go toward it..

Caption Competiton (NSFW?)

Chum Guzzler

[#27 posted by arkizzle , June 10, 2008 2:54 PM]

oh. oh dear.. that's.. yuk :)

[#28 posted by Takuan , June 10, 2008 2:54 PM]

"First time I ever saw one recoil like that"

[#29 posted by Cunning , June 10, 2008 2:56 PM]

Thank you for geose. I really needed a unicorn chaser after those more recently posted tongue whiskers. Made me chuckle out loud.

[#30 posted by arkizzle , June 10, 2008 2:56 PM]

Hah! very good indeed, Tak.

[#31 posted by Cunning , June 10, 2008 3:06 PM]

Thank you for geose. I really needed a unicorn chaser after those more recently posted tongue whiskers. Made me chuckle out loud.

[#32 posted by noen , June 10, 2008 3:24 PM]

I'm detecting a subtext here.

[#33 posted by BadKittyM , June 10, 2008 5:01 PM]

"If you eat one of these, and you're a man, does that make you gay?"

Only if you swallow.

I grew up in the Puget Sound area; used to go clamming (and no, that's not a euphemism for lesbian slap and tickle) but never was quick enough to successfully dig out a geoduck. They are extremely fast diggers, and can withdraw that neck back down to the shell quicker than you'd think possible. They are tasty, if you like clams.
/misses few things about Washington State
//clamming being one of them

[#34 posted by BadKittyM , June 10, 2008 5:05 PM]

(Apologies for the double-post - I had no idea that once the adult clam 'digs in,' it remains there its whole life. I'd always been told growing up, that you had to be really fast digging them out, because they too were digging down deeper) Learn something new every day, yippee!

[#35 posted by drewcon , June 10, 2008 5:08 PM]

ha,

Just saw some at the Tsukiji fish market in Tokyo.

http://invsblhnd.com/?p=139

[#36 posted by JG , June 10, 2008 5:20 PM]

I live in the PNW (Pacific Northwest)and have eaten Geoducks (pronounced gooey-ducks) on many occasions. They are tasty in sashimi or cooked.
A wonderful mollusk.
Ok, Ok, get over the phallic aspect. We eat corn, bananas, hot dogs and zucchinis, with much less fuss.

Many geoducks live to 100+ years, a marvel of nature and gastronomy.

They may look odd but they taste great.

JG

###

[#37 posted by Pipenta , June 10, 2008 5:25 PM]

Tasty as bananas maybe, but are gooeyducks an atheist's nightmare?

[#38 posted by Takuan , June 10, 2008 5:26 PM]

y'all know these little critters live over 100 years?
That maybe they are second only to Galapagos turtles? Always a little thrill eating someone older than many countries. Kinda like chopping down that 600 year old cedar tree. Yep.

[#39 posted by Pipenta , June 10, 2008 6:23 PM]

Some Tridacna species live that long, and they get a helluva lot bigger than gooeyducks. Plus they've got that funky symbiotic algae deal happening in their mantles.

Now if we can just hold off ocean acidification so that these and all the other critters that use calcium carbonate to make their shells/tests/exoskeletons will still be around fifty years from now.

[#40 posted by Takuan , June 10, 2008 6:31 PM]

I shouldn't worry about the acidification, the warming will get there first.

Speaking of,are we looking at the death of coral or the increase towards the poles of its range?

[#41 posted by lucia_engel , June 10, 2008 6:46 PM]

Tastes pretty good. I eat it as sashimi, in hot pot or congee.

http://d0.biggestmenu.com/00/00/5a/0d1843a42d9bd126_m.jpg

[#42 posted by dhelling , June 10, 2008 6:56 PM]

I also grew up in the Puget Sound area and we dug them up all the time when we went clamming at the beaches, but we never ate them or horse clams because they are both rather tough. Later on, in the late seventies or early eighties, I was eating at The Atlas Cafe and a gentleman, who ran another Chinese restaurant in Seattle, asked to join us and he ordered geoduck. He offered us a taste and I remember it being okay tasting, very chewy, but altogether pretty non distinct. He said that it was considered a delicacy to the Chinese, and gave us some tips on ordering our meals there in the future.

Unrelated factoid: We were surprised later when his name cropped up as one of the patrons killed in the Wah Mee massacre. http://www.historylink.org/essays/output.cfm?file_id=382

[#43 posted by arkizzle , June 10, 2008 7:30 PM]

#36 JG

"Ok, Ok, get over the phallic aspect. We eat corn, bananas, hot dogs and zucchinis, with much less fuss.

Noooooo!

This is in no way comparable to phallic vegetables or hot dogs. There is much more humour to be had by those of us, to whom these are brand new.

And in closing: tee he he!

[#44 posted by yakMasterB , June 10, 2008 10:09 PM]

Here is a good tutorial about harvesting Geoducks in NorCal, complete with awkward pics.

http://www.norcalkayakanglers.com/index.php/topic,3482.0.html

[#45 posted by eustace , June 10, 2008 10:38 PM]

A morris dance team from Washington State came to a morris dance convention (an "ale") in Southern California prepared to participate in the after-ale awards ceremonies with a plaque upon which a rudely fashioned Geoduck had been constructed with a clamshell, a bit of rug, and a large and flexible item purchased at a specialty shop (ahem). This award proved popular - it circulated for several years before falling apart.

[#46 posted by Takuan , June 10, 2008 10:42 PM]

no pictures???

[#47 posted by Glasses , June 11, 2008 12:41 AM]

Yeah, Evergreen's Fight Song is spectacular. And this Friday, during Graduation, several hundred people will sing it (including our choir), along with gestures!

[#48 posted by Rodney , June 11, 2008 12:43 AM]

I just got back from 6 weeks in Japan with my program at Evergreen. I didn't even think to see if I could get geoduck there. I couldn't bring myself to eat the horseflesh sashimi, but I totally would have eaten some geoduck.

[#49 posted by Beanolini , June 11, 2008 1:09 AM]

I was sent a link to a video about these just a couple of days ago. Not got round to watching it yet, thanks for the reminder!

[#50 posted by eustace , June 11, 2008 1:16 AM]

I have no pics, Takuan, but I'll ask around. Someone more photographically inclined probably does, and I know several such.

[#51 posted by dogu4 , June 11, 2008 7:09 AM]

I've had it prepared as a tenderized cutlet, breaded and pan fried and it was very tasty and reminded me of abalone. I'd love to try that ceviche recipe one day should I find myself once again in geoduck country. And as curious as it looks, the process of catching 'em (digging actually) and having 'em escape your fastest and most furious efforts always left me laughing...of course I was usually high while doing it...which helped a lot.

[#52 posted by ttcfcl , June 11, 2008 11:39 AM]

I think what separates geoducks from regular phallic food (hot dogs, corn dogs, even beer bottles) is that geoducks are HUGE and make us men feel inadequate. Also, they look exactly like a horses penis.

PS I read this just after the dude with the weird tongue things. I'm actually having fun grossing myself out today.

[#53 posted by arkizzle , June 11, 2008 3:30 PM]

Horse penis.

My (admittedly not the sort of thing to admit to on the internet) thoughts exactly.

[#54 posted by clammy , June 11, 2008 5:49 PM]

Don't read this if you're planning on eating any geoduck :) (Or anything else for a little while, if you're squeamish.)

I had a summer job testing shellfish for bacteria and toxins in Vancouver. Geoducks were pretty easy to deal with, because you just sliced the shell away from the body, dug out the tennis ball-sized 'gutball', and threw it in a blender (much easier than shucking dozens of itty-bitty clams to get enough meat to test). It gets much worse than the mere existance of 'gutballs', though!

Geoducks were shipped from hundreds of kilometres away and could take several days to arrive in the lab. They were shipped in dark plastic, sealed containers, which could be pretty... fragrant after their journey. Imagine half a dozen, 2-3 foot-long geoducks, warmed to 40C, in airtight containers, over a weekend... from these experiences I can verify that if something smells bad enough, the odour actually is visible.

[#55 posted by KitchenMaus , June 12, 2008 4:39 PM]

I ate geoduck sushi the other night for the first time! Very interesting! Sort of like octopus sushi, but much better!