Masked man with chainsaw spotted in Oxford
Citizens observed a masked individual wielding a running chainsaw walking around Bicester, Oxfordshire, England. Turns out he was on his way to a costume party. From the Lancashire Evening Post:
Terrified residents in Bicester, Oxford, called police with a description and an armed response unit and the force helicopter were scrambled in minutes.Link (via Fortean Times)
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Must have been a great costume, very convincing.
Heaven only knows what would happen if the literary heroes of yesteryear lived today...
"Prominent Sleuth Proclaims Innocence"
Metropolitan police today arrested Lord Peter Wimsey for violation of the frightful dress ordinance. "He said he was on his way to a party," said a spokesman, "but what reasonable citizen would wear motley and a domino mask in public? He could have been an Al Qaeda terrorist!"
"Wooster residence."
"Jeeves, this is Bertie. Listen quick, I only have a three minute call."
"Yes, sir."
"I need you to eat some fish and put that magnificent brain in gear. You know Boat Race night was the night before last? Bingo Little and I got a bit sloshed, and I bet him a fiver he wouldn't steal a policeman's helmet. And now we're in some place in Cuba, I think they call it Guantanamo. Rummy place, Jeeves. They refuse to provide kippers or the fragrant eggs and b. for breakfast. By the way, have you ever heard of something called 'rendition'?"
This time, I have no sympathy. Calling the cops on a masked man with a running chainsaw is not paranoia. Going around with a mask and running chainsaw is being a dumbass.
I'm just surprised the authorities came. It's not like he had a camera or anything.
this seems like a good time to exchange worst chain saw accidents ever stories. Who is in?
Tell us how the party was first Takuan.
So, what was the helicopter supposed to do anyway? If he's just casually walking, would he be that tough to track? Wouldn't a loud, thumping rotor just scare him away.
/lewd entendres invited
I've stayed away from amputiferous tools ever since I chopped my knee open with an ax.
People really do seem to snap around exam time.
Wot? I thought *everyone* brought a mask and horticultural implement to a Gaudy.
When I visited Costa Rica, I saw a Jamaican man walking down the street wearing a blue speedo and carrying a machete. No one balked.
When I was stationed at RAF Upper Heyford around 1989, I was living off base in Bicester. I worked the night shift and got to and from the base on a 125cc motorbike. One night I was riding home wearing my BDUs (camo fatigues) and I had a gray poster tube slung across my back. Shortly before entering Bicester I was pulled over by a patrol car. It turned out they thought I had a rocket launcher. I had to take it apart and show them the posters inside before they would let me go. Good times.
Right. Freak in a "deer stalker" cap seen slinking about Bond Street. Seems to have a case of the sniffles. Mutters to himself.
I bet he's glad he didn't dress up as Osama Bin Laden for that costume party.
Maybe he could get together with this guy:
At 6:31 a.m. April 7, in the 1900 block of SW 356th Street, two men were strangely wandering around their house. One was wearing a tank top and pants, yelling that he was hearing and seeing things outside. He was saying that people were stealing from him, and was pointing at his garage. Police said that the man appeared to be paranoid and delusional, and that he was living in filth, utilizing the stove as heat. The other man was running around the yard with a hammer.
From here:
http://www.fedwaymirror.com/portals-code/list.cgi?paper=91&cat=23&id=1197939&more=0
Well if we're going to start on that, how about a naked guy with a leopard around his neck in downtown LA? Mildly NSFW.
Hey, at least he wasn't carrying something really scary, like a camera...
Antinous, I thought it couldn't be as funny as it sounded. I was wrong.