Pretenders to the "I Can't Believe It's Not Butter!" throne
Serious Eats has a not-so-serious look at margarine brands that mimic the "I Can't Believe It's Not Butter!" brand. My favorite is the Taiwanese tub of something called "Unbelieveable this is not butter." (Photo from Wm Jas' highly entertaining Flickr photos)
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I'm also a fan of "Stop Me If You've Heard This One, But I'm Fairly Certain That This Is A Butter Substitute"
and also
"I Don't Know If You've Noticed, But This Isn't Butter"
I tend to stay away from "This Ain't Butter" as they're just phoning it in and I don't trust 'em.
A long time ago, I came up with a parody name, intended to be pronounced (with a hint of irritation) by Fabio, who was doing silly commercials for the product at the time... Just imagine him reaching into the refrigerator, pulling out a tub, and saying "hmm -- 'I Thought I Said To Get Butter'"
ZOMG! its not butter.
if $it > butter then $belief = "false";
er, my above comment seems to have been compu-butchered (yet still makes sense). Guess I have to jot it out in pseudocode:
if $it (string) is not equal to "butter"
then
set $belief (boolean) to false
and don't forget: Butter? Whatever.
what is real is the diarrhea you get from eating that product.
My knockoff would be named: I Can't Believe It's Not I Can't Believe It's Not Butter.
Ha! That reminds me of a story about my mother, who was raised in Italy and never formally learned to write in English. A few years ago, I was home for the holidays and my mother was making a shopping list. One of the items she endearingly jotted down was: "I Can Believe in Butter" -- now *that's* a product I would buy!
I shop at Fred Meyer, and am greatly disappointed that I never "discovered" Butter It's Not myself.
ugh margarine... gross... I like what Anthony Bourdain said about that:
"I can't believe it's not butter?"
"I can!"
If it's not butter; it's crap!
The Big Y supermarket chain (Western MA) has: No Ifs Ands Or Butter! (No, there are no commas. Yes, there is an exclamation point.)
Even better, when I first tried to post this comment, I got the error message that "The text entered was wrong." I wholeheartedly agree.
Thanks for all of these funny ones. I managed to crack a smile, even!
I think someone should come out with a good organic real butter brand - something along the lines of "This is actually butter." Or "Absolutely, Totally, and in all other ways, Inconceivable! It's real butter!"
"It lies on my toast like a yellow sticky tarp!
I know it's not butter, but I can't believe it's carp!"
[/Most Extreme Elimination Challenge]
I always enjoy Elyse Sewell's photography, nice to see she's inspired others, too!
In Alberta we used to have "Honest To Goodness Spread". It had similar packaging to "I Can't believe...", but the word margarine did not appear on the container anywhere. The 'spread' had no yellow food colouring and was white.
My favorite: "Butter? I don't even KNOW her! Ahahahaha!"
this post reminds me of a great "list" from mcsweeney's (even though it deals with yogurt): http://mcsweeneys.net/links/lists/21StephenThompson.html
Butter butter butter butter...the word has lost all meaning.
82% fat or bust.
"Utterly Butterly" was the first product of the sort to frighten me when moving to the UK.
They also (I just noticed) have a strange website where you can fly a plane over a school made of, uh, Utterly Butterly Tubs.
I can't believe it's vegetable oil saturated by a nickel catalyst!
No, really. Science is like magic.
I can't believe we use heat pasturized milk to make butter in this country.
It's not really butter if you remove the moo-ey goodness with 138 °C (250 °F) worth of heat.
Screw the protazoa!