IRS wants you to report your bribes as income

Consumerism Commentary runs down the weirder wrinkles in the US tax code, including the rules governing bribes and the stuff you own, but which does not belong to you:

Q. This year, I’ve been taking bribes to keep the caviar smuggling ring off the FBI radar. Do I have to report this?

A. Yes. If you receive a bribe, include it in your income...

Q. I found an abandoned car and kept it while the person who lost the vehicle presumably wept. Do I have to report this?

A. Yes. If you find and keep property that does not belong to you that has been lost or abandoned (treasure-trove), it is taxable to you at its fair market value in the first year it is your undisputed possession.

Link (via Consumerist)