Top 10 sex memes of 2006, by Violet Blue

Blogger and San Francisco Chronicle columnist Violet Blue shares this roundup of memorable moments in memehood with BoingBoing readers. Full text follows after the jump.

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The Top Ten Sex Memes of 2006
Violet Blue

Memes snake around and wind up on everyone's blogs, sites, get injected into inboxes and become just generally known by most without widespread recognition from a news or mainstream media site. They propagate, survive, spread and mutate, through a user-supported natural selection process. Typically -- and especially with sex memes -- they're too scary or NSFW to get any official traffic. And yet everyone finds out about them, and are fascinated for at least one solid minute. But the best part of sex memes, besides the weirdness and snarky wrong ironic humor? The gap between perception and reality is often a goatse-like chasm...

10. Celebrity Cooch Flash-A-Palooza
I'm just relieved that leatherface Joan Rivers isn't on the cooch-flashing bandwagon this year, but if trends continue through 2007, we'll be seeing that (no doubt) surgical wonder in no time. Pretending to flash your pantyless pundenda was the new black for starlets 85 lbs. and above and they made the webrounds like a coke-encrusted credit card in the Marmont bathroom. On the list: Pam, Paris, Britney (don't forget the "sex tape" -- *yawn*), Lindsay... even D-list porn stars like Mary Carey gave it a try (and gets a double "D" for effort).

9. Boobs in a Box
Make him open the box. It came in late as a year-end meme entry, but the popularity of MC Slutsky's grrly nerdcore response to SNL's "Dick in a Box" (a la "Lazy Sunday") had the balls to stand firm and bust moves all over Timberlake's errant Yule log. Seriously, that shit really put my tits in a box.

8. George Bush Butt Plug
If I had a butt plug for every time this got sent to me, I'd have like five thousand pounds of butt plug in my hizzouse. A butt plug. In the shape of George W. Bush. Ha. Sigh.

7. Pinky Violence
Posted and re-posted in a variety of places, Pinky Violence videos were the explicit retro video snips of the moment when first discovered on video sharing sites. Featuring lots of disturbing sex and violence scenes, the ones most noticed focused on a female character with great tattoos and mad killing skills as hot-babe-with gun/sword, usually avenging her own (graphically depicted) rape.

6. Sex and Google Trends; Sex and Google Patents
Everyone did it with lurid fascination, then forgot. When Google's search) Trends tool was released, you can bet what people were most compelled to search for (after their sites and names, of course) -- sex, anal, oral and otherwise. Same went for the newly released Google Patents, because Google just wouldn't be fun unless you could call up a n Anal Orgasm Monitor or Vibrating Tampon patent to pass those long afternoons spent in the cube farm...

5. The 500 Person Japanese Orgy
This one still surfaces on sex blogs around the world, to much curious explanation and bizarre conjecture. And it should -- these explicit videos of a room full of (500?) Japanese women and men all neatly arranged in Yoga-class rows, having sex like no one else is in the room are... downright compelling, and confusing for a variety of reasons. So many questions. So much high-pitched squealing. So few answers. March of the Penguins, indeed.

4. The Seattle Craigslist Experiment Scandal
Griefers, unite -- Jason Fortuny really did spoof a hardcore submissive ad on Craigslist for the sport of exposing every single person who responded to public scrutiny (and got at least one Microsoft employee in hot water), and it was all over the 'spheres, from Metblogs Seattle to the Bondage.com forums. The NYT never picked it up -- likely because of the complex and explicit nature of the sexual content, but it spawned copycat griefer Michael Crook, who is still making bogus DMCA claims and drawing the EFF's ire.

3. A Series of (Fallopian) Tubes
Senator Stevens gave us the tubes with which we understand the Interwebs; a visit to this year's Hackers On Planet Earth conference gave us the truest form of tube-wrangling that only a hacker could inspire: the female physiological callback to one senator's obsession with tubeage. Then, of course, came the YouTube video.

2. Phonecam Subway Masturbator
As if some guy jacking off in your face on the subway wouldn't put any girl's tits in a box, this was the year public transit dick-waggers got a taste of the information age, yo. The lesson was this: wank at me, and I will make you a star, the star of douchebaglandia (read: I'll put your flappy bits on Flickr). What was worse, the cock-waggling dude in question only got two years' probation for his nonconsensual public sex acts, and claimed that his phonecam-snapping victim would "probably want to go out with me."

1. Let's Sexy Engrish
Some sites claimed it was a video of "prostitute lessons", others thought it was a serious educational video -- while the rest of us just took it all in, sexy school settings, mangled adult engrish... the whole wonderful, enunciational-porn video. Boing Boing readers had a comment orgy, and the video was watched by many.

Horrifying bonus meme: Actual tentacle porn.
This was going to be a "number #11" on the list but like the actual goatse, the links are almost too awful to follow. But at your own extreme risk: this year saw a rising trend of passing (and surfacing) links to pages depicting Asian-style tentacle porn staged in real-life scenarios. (Following links lead to writeups on iron-stomached sex blog, Fleshbot.) Hot Octopus Love still gets tons of reposts, while other scary sites (like Genki Genki) increasingly have images snagged and reposted on shock-value blogs. Yikes, and.... ew.

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