By eating this food, you agree to the following:

Andy Sternberg's "Small Print Project" continues to rack up astounding examples of crummy "user agreements" that you find yourself entering into by buying goods and services. Seems like no one wants to "sell" you anything anymore -- everything comes with a lame-ass "agreement" that you don't get to negotiate.

Small Print's collecting the worst of 'em -- like, when you install Flash Player, you agree to let Adobe audit your PC at any time, and the scam artist who makes you promise you're not from the FTC as a condition of looking at his site. But this one takes the cake: edible paper with a EULA printed on it -- by eating it, you "agree":

Product: A chef in a Chicago restaurant recently perfected a line of edible paper. Customers receive an image of cotton candy printed on a sheet of paper that tastes like cotton candy. Customers who order the treat receive it with the following printed under it: Confidential Property of and © H. Cantu. Patent Pending. No further use or disclosure is permitted without prior approval of H. Cantu.

As seen in: November Food and Wine

Lowpoints: If the treat dissolves on your tongue, does that mean it’s a saliva-wrap license? You eat it, therefore you agree to its terms?

Highpoints: I’m sure the paper is delicious.

Link

See also Small Print Project: collecting the "agreements" shoved down your throat

Update: Steve sez, "Any idea if any friendly lawyer-types have considered putting together a 'counter-EULA'? Ideally, it would be simple form letter that you can mail back to a company that you've recently done business with, that would read "By opening this envelope, you agree to release [name] from the EULA bundled with [product]", and go on from there with the proper legalese. After all, if they believe that opening a product box signals acceptance of a contract, then it's no different the other way around."