Student docs share funny lessons from patients

On a forum for student doctors working in emergency rooms, a thread for "lessons learned from my patients," oscillating between the sobering to the uproarious:

One thing I've learned from 3 EM rotations is: Stay away from people named "Some Guy" or "This One Dude", because they for whatever reason, just punch someone in the face or hit them with a crowbar and run off. If I see them on the street, I cross the street to get away from them...

Never, ever leave flashlights, shampoo bottles, beer bottles or any long, circular object on the floor because someday you will fall on it and it will somehow, work its way up your rectum.

Link (via Making Light)